Most people remember those commercials after the Super Bowl or other major sporting events where the MVP would asked, “You’ve won the Super Bowl, now what are you going to do?” The answer was always the same “I’m going to Disneyland.”

Why was this the answer? Quite simply because it is still the ultimate playground, no matter how old we get. Unfortunately this sometimes translates into skewered actions in real life, including on behalf of the non-custodial parent in divorce cases.

This is not to say that the non-custodial parent takes his or her children on trips or lavish vacations. On the contrary, due to the limited time most non-custodial parents have it is almost impossible to actually take long trips and adventures. In fact, these parents are known as 14 percenter parents, a term used in divorce circles to describe the non-custodial parent with standard every other weekend visitation for child custody, which amounts for the most part to a mere 14 percent. Most parents find that since their time is limited it is important to make the most of it.

When in this scenario, it’s not unusual for parents to act as if their visitations are an ultimate adventure. Simply put, the parent does his or her best to outdo the previous visit by jumping from fun event to fun event while eating candy and junk food. Sadly these actions set up unrealistic expectations for future visits with the parent. Of course, this also doesn’t sit so well with the other parent. Following each visit the kids go back to their custodial parent stuffed with sugar and spouting off tales of their adventures with the other parent.

Instinctively there is an ongoing struggle between right and wrong. Most moms and dads who embrace Disneyland Dad actions do not believe it is the wrong thing to do. And possibly it isn’t. However, does this make things more difficult for the children, other parent, and non-custodial parent. It can even harm the relationship between the Disneyland dad and his children by skewing discipline and boundaries.

There is nothing wrong with occasionally spoiling your children with treats, but wholesome family activities such as visits to a bookstore, a school event, or even just a walk through park are grossly underappreciated. It’s never too late to establish a post-divorce routine with your children and institute boundaries that will help your relationship grow despite the fact you only have minimal time with your children.