If you and your spouse or partner are struggling together to stop your divorce trying desperately to save your marriage or surviving an affair this is a crucial piece of advice on relationships and a vital piece of the puzzle which can mean the difference between success and failure.

If a relationship was a corporation, there would be clear guidelines in place on the running of the relationship to ensure that things ran smoothly and that the relationship could weather adverse conditions successfully.

Sadly very few peoples relationships have guidelines in place that allow them to operate in this manner. If they did there would be far fewer divorces and relationship breakdowns than there is today.

These guidelines would be based on each others relationship needs. In other words what does each person need to be getting from the relationship in order for them to feel happy secure and feel that the relationship is on track and operating successfully?

The trouble is that many couples don’t seriously consider their own relationship needs or share them in detail with their partner, these needs are just assumed rather than actually outlined and openly discussed.

When things go wrong it is invariably because one or other or both parties relationship needs have not been met, often for some significant time. Because neither of you has a clear understanding of the others needs in the relationship, it can be very hard to understanding why things are going so wrong.

An ESSENTIAL FIRST STEP, is to both sit down together, and without anger and confrontation, discuss your relationship needs openly and honestly.. Look at all areas of your life.

Clearly outline what your relationship needs are in the mental, physical and spiritual areas? Really think hard about what you need and really listen to what your partner says.

Use the I word. " I need to feel loved and accepted for who I am" rather than "you are always critical of me and act harshly towards me".

By undertaking this excercise together, both of you will gain a far clearer insight into your relationship needs, and this will allow you to begin healing the rifts and saving your marriage.

If you want to make a powerful start today on saving your marriage or relationship before it becomes too late visit my site http://www.squidoo.com/marriage-relationship-help-advice   where I share with you an extremely powerful and SIMPLE 7 STEP RECONCILLIATION PROCCESS which has had fantastic results for my clients.